How heartbreaking and challenging. I know this too well unfortunately. The system does everything to keep you doing the care. In a way it helped that my dad wanted nothing to do with me anymore. It forced their hand. Still though, it was a pretty undignified last few months for him. But that is what he wanted. Unfortunately folks with dementia don't have the best judgement. So nobody wins really.

I hope that May 18 bring you hope and some acceptable solutions for the future. Thinking good positive thoughts. You are an amazing daughter.